I happen to know and admire Terry White and his wife Rhonda. I have worked with them on a few assignments, and count them amongst my dear friends.

Terry and Rhonda had sent a copy of the book to me, and upon reading it, I wrote this letter to thank them. I thought to publish the letter here to share with you how the book impacted me. The book is available from all stores or from University of Queensland Press if you click here.

My letter to Terry and Rhonda follows:

My dear friends

I have often said, ‘When you see successful people, don’t just applaud… also shed a tear, because their journey would have been long and hard.’

I always knew that you, Rhonda and Terry, were remarkable souls. I had no idea about your background. I just knew that Terry was involved in serving his community via politics, and that Rhonda is a formidable retailing genius who raised a loving family while taking an interest in a range of fields. I knew nothing of the details, and I am not one to ask, preferring to give my friends their privacy.

It was evident from our special moments together that your rivers ‘ran deep’ and that your spirit was touched by God. All I knew was that you were delightful people who had energy and drive, and who held-firm to your principles. These inspiring qualities were evident from day-one. Your aura exuded your essence, which I felt was grounded in Christian values. It was by your actions that I knew who you were… citizens of substance and joy.

Before your book arrived, I had always held you both in the highest esteem. I did not know your history, and had no idea about your many challenges. I just felt that you were seasoned life-travellers whose journey was no doubt tough and rough, albeit rich and rewarding for you, your family, and all those who were fortunate enough to come into contact with you.

When you kindly sent me a copy of ‘A Prescription for Change’, I opened it in order to glance at it, thinking that I would put it aside and read it during a quiet moment. Alas, I was magnetised to it and could not put it down until I had devoured several chapters and realised that I was late to my next meeting.

Indeed, your story is an important one for so many people, on so many fronts. Your dear friends will benefit from learning more about your amazing childhood and teenage years, and about your family struggles that were not dissimilar to the struggles of many humble families of the day (not to mention the many families of modern times). Yet, it is fascinating that Terry would say that he enjoyed and appreciated his youth. Despite the hardship, it seems that you were grateful. This is a reflection of your good nature: you endure what comes, and you find the gems amidst the fire.

I am glad that you shared with us how you met Rhonda. Mind you, I felt uneasy about you leaving your sweetheart to go overseas, but I guess in every decision, we find lessons that will hold us in good stead. Indeed, it seems that your travels had awakened important questions in your mind.

The writer, Mr Tony Koch, must be commended for being able to re-tell each story in a simple, yet colourful way. Mr Koch was at no time an obstacle to the reader. I was able to visualise the townships, your workshops, your school, and your family gatherings. The only disappointment was that each chapter was shorter than I needed. I always felt that I would have benefited from additional stories. Then again, this is not a criticism. It highlights the skills of the writer: leaving the reader wanting more.

The political story woven throughout the book was gripping. At the time of his reign, I was too young to have fully understood what Joh Bjelke-Petersen stood for. I do recall his pesky presence on television, and I often wondered about his policies. Back then, I had no idea about the complexity of the political landscape which I now realise was a large part of your daily battles. Your book has sparked an interest to research that era in order to understand the corruption and the power-plays that were no doubt frustrating beyond belief. Although it is all over, I do feel for you both. I had not experienced this type of political degradation, but I did live through similar absurdities during the war in Beirut and later through similar human putridity while working for global corporate machines.

Those who have not been squeezed by unfathomable human/political weakness, might not fully appreciate the immense pressure that you must have suffered, while trying to push away the tide of injustice, pleading for some sanity and support from your friends who, instead of assisting you, were ‘advising’ you to back-off. Oh, I do know how difficult this can be. It is like being in a noisy chaotic street wherein no-one can hear you crying out for help.

Terry and Rhonda, your persistence in the face of opposition became obvious throughout the book, and it was during such moments that I, as the reader, and as someone who admires you, felt tense with frustration about a situation that I think still prevails to this day: the bastards make it difficult for the decent folk to get on with the job. But you held your ground, while you ran a business, stood-up to unethical business giants, raised a family, and clutched to your values.

I marvel at what people presume the act of ‘leadership’ to really mean. They often see leadership as some form of orchestration from on-high.

I believe that the story portrayed in your book is a perfect example of leadership: leading yourselves amidst turbulent, lonely, and scary times, while many about you are falling, failing, or distancing themselves. Yours is a story of leadership-in-action, fought in the trenches… declaring yet another war with another greedy idiot, while wondering if this punch might well be your last, or if that blow might well be the final one to knock you down. Despite these grave risks, you attacked, you defended, you bruised, and you pressed on, moved on… That was leadership: carving a new path through a dark jungle, simply because you refused to walk along easy-street where corruption of the mind and soul would have been the cheaper price for a smoother ride.

I found the book engaging. It is filled with lessons about perseverance and justice. It is a real story that depicts two people in the act of following their heart, even if it meant losing friends and infuriating people.

No doubt many have told you how funny it was to read: ‘Benjamin, say the fuck word one more time and you’ll have to stay here — I can’t afford one more fuck.’ I was glad that I was not drinking at the time of reading this chapter, because I would have sprayed the room. That line will go down in history as a cute example of a stressful altercation, involving the delightful Rhonda White whose body-language and voice jumped out from the page. I burst out laughing. Isn’t it interesting that we can find humour in such dramatic incidents that punctuate our lives. Perhaps time heals and time soothes and in the end, life’s struggles settle to reveal our strengths.

The survivors will endure; looking back to learn, to smile, to laugh. Indeed, we can laugh at what can now be described as a knee-slapper about a precious mother-and-son moment.

I thank you, dear friends, for sharing your story with me. And I congratulate Tony Koch on a story well told.

I have purchased additional copies to enrich my friends. ‘A Prescription for Change’ is more than an inspiring story. It is agitating, uplifting, insightful, and indeed infuriating because it reminds us that the world has not changed. Stupidity and myopia abound.

In the end, there is hope. We can learn from Rhonda and Terry that, by the Grace of God, we must neither give-up nor give-in.

You are role models for the new warriors who can learn from you both and say, ‘I, too, shall stand my ground. I shall not surrender!’

In my prayers, and with immense admiration,

Jonar Nader

Every few years I discard boxes full of books. I purchase many, but I rarely hang on to them. My collection is small. The only books I keep are my favourites, or those I treasure for sentimental reasons, and those given to me as gifts, or by fellow authors.

I must admit that I do judge a book by its cover. Of course it is unfair to do so. However, the attention-to-detail that an author and publisher give to a book’s production, including its colour, layout, and paper, all reveal a great deal about the respect they have for their work, and for their readers. It is for that reason that all my books are meticulously designed. I recall a meeting with a production manager at Prentice Hall who looked up and said, ‘Gosh, never before have we spent so much time debating where the folios [page numbers] ought to go.’ That was both a complaint and a compliment to the level of attention that I insist on when publishing or producing material. Apart from taking pride in my work, it is also a mark of respect for my readers who deserve to be treated to a quality product both in content and in production.

Feel free to share your thoughts with me.

Here is more brilliant advice, read by David Warrilow from a Shambhala audio book.

ATTENTION

BRAVERY

CLARITY

DEPLETION

DESIRE

DIFFERENCES

EGO

EVALUATE PEOPLE

EXCELLENT LEADERS

FIRMNESS

FOCUS AND AWARENESS

GOING WITH THE FLOW

GOOD AND EVIL

HAPPINESS

HUMAN NATURE

INFLUENCE

KNOWLEDGE

PLEASURE

PUNISHMENT

QUALITIES OF A LEADER

REWARDS

SELF DEVELOPMENT

SUCCESS

THE WAY

UNDERSTANDING THE UNIVERSE

VICTORY

WHAT PEOPLE VALUE

‘The Art of War’ by Sun Tzu, also translated by Thomas Cleary, gives advice about prudence. ‘The Book of Balance and Harmony’ is another exceptional work. Here is an excerpt translated by Thomas Cleary, published by Shambhala Publications:

‘Deep knowledge is to be aware of disturbance before disturbance, to be aware of danger before danger, to be aware of destruction before destruction, to be aware of calamity before calamity. Strong action is training the body without being burdened by the body, exercising the mind without being used by the mind, working in the world without being affected by the world, carrying out tasks without being obstructed by tasks…

‘To sense and comprehend after action is not worthy of being called comprehension. To accomplish after striving is not worthy of being called accomplishment. To know after seeing is not worthy of being called knowing. These three are far from the way of sensing and response.

‘Indeed, to be able to do something before it exists, sense something before it becomes active, see something before it sprouts, are three abilities that develop interdependently. Then nothing is sensed but is comprehended, nothing is undertaken without response, nowhere does one go without benefit.’

As a digital-age philosopher, I delight in learning about the philosophers of old. Bryce Magee’s book, ‘The Great Philosophers’, provides insight into the forefathers of this field.

What a small world. During an Australia Day Awards ceremony, Abla and I happened to be in the same room, each receiving an award. I did not have the change to introduce myself. I shall remain a distant admirer. If you happen to be in Melbourne, you might meet Abla at her restaurant.

Naturally, any well-written book about high technology and mathematics is of interest. Cookbooks are delightful too, especially if they have excellent photographs of delicious creations. In the absence of tantalising photographs, a cookbook must be accurate and simple to follow. My latest favourite is ‘The Lebanese Kitchen’ by Abla Amad. This book wins hands down for its simplicity and accuracy. Perhaps my well-developed palate (thanks to my mother) for Lebanese food has made me overly critical of all Lebanese restaurants and cookbooks. However, Amad’s masterpiece is deserving of praise.

I also enjoy books like Lewis Carroll’s ‘Alice in Wonderland’ (which was first called ‘Alice’s Adventure Under Ground’ when it was written in 1865). I enjoy this book because it has many hidden messages. I was fascinated about how it came to be written, including how it was illustrated and published, and how Carroll negotiated with his publishers. By the way, many people do not know that Carroll’s real name was Charles Lutwidge Dodgson (born 1832). He was a mathematician who enjoyed the processes of logic, and engaged in photography, art, theatre, religion, medicine, and science. Hollywood still makes movies about Alice.

With my love for comedy, I particularly delve into books about the subject, including ‘Bring me Laughter’ by Bruce Crowther and Mike Pinfold. I read manuscripts from stage and screen — mostly from the BBC.

Autobiographies are interesting, except that I rarely have the time to read huge tomes as they often are. If the books are short, I am more likely to pick them up. For example, I liked learning about John Cleese from a book by Jonathan Margolis called ‘Cleese Encounters’.

Published diaries are far more interesting. ‘The Kenneth Williams Diaries’, edited by Russell Davies, give an insight into Williams’ life. (Both Cleese and Williams are mentioned in my Favourite Comedy page at my website). Williams kept a diary since he was fifteen years old, leaving behind 43 years’ worth of diaries. He said that, ‘Diaries are written so that one has a record of events, and because there are certain events one wants to remember. There is perhaps also the element of the confessional in them, and that isn’t a bad thing in my eyes. It has certainly eased my loneliness.’ His last diary entry in April 1988 had many people speculate about his death. His entry ends with an explanation of his back pain and stomach trouble, wherein he describes it as ‘torture’. The last line from his diary that contained four million words read, ‘…what’s the bloody point?’ His close friends could not accept that he might have committed suicide.

‘The Letters of Vincent van Gogh’, edited by Mark Roskill, help to explain how some people cope with passionate pursuits. Vincent’s paintings are attractive. However, I cannot agree with their current exorbitant value. I cannot see that his paintings are worth millions of dollars, except for the fact that one would be buying a piece of passion. Vincent reveals madness in his life. His letters to his brother, Theo, gave us clues about his poverty and his fixation with art. I enjoyed this book not so much from an artistic angle, but for what it has taught me about the meaning of passion for one’s work. As sad as his life was, Vincent was a model for anyone who decides to dedicate every fibre to a project. If Vincent had ten cents to his name, he would not hesitate to buy a paintbrush, knowing full well that he would go without dinner for a week. An example of this is given in a letter to his brother in October 1888 wherein he writes, ‘Thank you for your letter, but I’ve had a poor time of it these last days; my money ran out on Thursday, and so it proved a hellishly long time between then and Monday noon. During these four days I have lived mainly off coffee, 23 cups of it, with bread…’ No sooner his brother sent him money, than he spent it all that afternoon on frames, canvas, and brushes.

HORNER: Why is it desirable from a military point of view to have a man on the moon? Partly, from the classic point of view, because it is there. Partly because we might be afraid that the USSR might get one there first and realise advantage which we had not anticipated existed there…

FLOOD: If we gave you all the money you said was necessary, regardless of how much it was, can you in the Air Force hit the moon with something, anything, before Christmas?

HORNER: I feel sure we can. There is always a certain amount of risk in this kind of undertaking, but we feel that we can do that; yes sir.

FLOOD: Have you asked anybody in the Air Force or the Department of Defense to give you enough money, hardware, and people, starting at midnight tonight, to chip a piece out of that ball of green cheese for a Christmas present to Uncle Sam? Have you asked for that?

HORNER: We have submitted such a program to the Office of the Secretary of Defense. It is currently under consideration.

FLOOD: I am for giving it to them as of this minute, Mr Chairman, with our supplemental, without waiting for somebody downtown to make up his mind to ask for it. If this man means what he says and he knows what he is talking about, and I think he does, then this committee should not wait five minutes more today. We should give him all the money and all the hardware and all the people he wants, regardless of what anybody else says or wants, and tell him to go up on top of some hill and do it without question.

Reading raises my blood pressure because I become so excited about what I am learning (or disgusted with what I am reading). Either way, it is not a soothing experience.

Gibran was born in Lebanon in 1883 and suffered great poverty due to his parent's sad state of affairs. His mother took him to the USA in 1895. He became a soulful author and poet whose works are still bestsellers to this day.

It is interesting that when friends are trying to learn more about each other, they compare notes about the books they have read. At my book launches, invariably someone comes up to me after a signing and asks me to tell them what my favourite book is. As an author myself, people tend to be curious about what I like to read. I recall telling a young man that my favourite book is Gibran Khalil Gibran’s ‘The Prophet’ (written in 1923). He went and bought a copy straight away.

‘The Prophet’ is a book that I read twice a year (and have done so since I was sixteen years old). It is special because it grows with me. It helps to trigger thoughts that enable me to better understand life and its mysteries. Each chapter can be read in a matter of minutes, and that was part of its appeal. Here are some audio excerpts that will give you an idea about its depths. They are read by Richard Harris, with background music by Arif Mardin. You might enjoy what Gibran has to say about:

RELIGION

PLEASURE

LAW

FRIENDSHIP

When I was seven years old, I went to a small country town in the hills of Lebanon, and there I saw what looked like a shrine for Gibran. The local townsfolk had built a memorial for him because Gibran was born there. Mind you, in his days, Gibran infuriated the establishment. Bishops and cardinals rebuked him and his writings. They used to burn his books in the city square, and tried to tell their parishioners that Gibran’s work was evil. Interestingly, when Gibran died, the Church grieved and held services in his honour because leaders began to appreciate his works.

Incidentally, for my book, ‘How to Lose Friends and Infuriate Lovers’, I was encouraged by one of my friends, Matthew, to steer clear of a business-like biographical outline for ‘About the author’. A fellow author and philosopher, Matthew challenged me to write something about my childhood. This is what emerged; it is narrated here by Maria Mastro. You can download the text along with Chapter One from ‘How to Lose Friends and Infuriate Lovers’ from my website.

ABOUT THE AUTHOR, FROM ‘HOW TO LOSE FRIENDS AND INFURIATE LOVERS’

Gibran wrote many books while in Lebanon, and while in the USA, including ‘The Wanderer’, ‘The Garden of the Prophet’, ‘Spirits Rebellious’, ‘Jesus the Son of Man’, ‘Mirrors of the Soul’, ‘The Madman’, ‘The Forerunner’, and ‘The Broken Wings’. Here are a few excerpts from his books. Notice how Gibran is able to pack so many thoughts in very short phrases. These are read by Stephen Lang. They are from a production by Random House. Gibran expresses his ideas about:

A PERSON’S SIGNIFICANCE

AUTHORS

A DISTRAUGHT MOTHER

BEAUTY AND UGLINESS

SWIFTNESS

GROWING

TO SEE AND LISTEN

ABSOLUTE TRUTH

Gibran’s book ‘Sand and Foam’ contains marvellous quotable quotes that speak volumes. Here are several quotes from a man who had a tough life, and who died aged 48.

‘Forgetfulness is a form of freedom.’

‘Only love and death change all thing.’

‘The reality of the other person is not in what he reveals to you. Therefore, if you would understand him, listen not to what he says but rather to what he does not say.’

‘When life does not find a singer to sing what is in her heart, she produces a philosopher to speak her mind.’

‘Poetry is not an opinion expressed. It is a song that rises from a bleeding wound or a smiling mouth.’ ‘I have more in my heart than upon my tongue, and more in my desire than in my mind.’

‘Thinking is always the stumbling stone to poetry.’

‘We shall never understand one another until we reduce the language to seven words.’

‘Generosity is not in giving me that which I need more than you do, but in giving me that which you need more than I do.’

‘You are indeed charitable when you give, and while giving, turn your face away so that you may not see the shyness of the receiver.’ ‘The difference between the richest man and the poorest is but a day of hunger and an hour of thirst.’

‘We often borrow from our tomorrows to pay our debts to our yesterdays.’

‘He who can put his finger upon that which divides good from evil is he who can touch the very hem of the garment of God.’

‘The truly just is he who feels half guilty of your misdeeds.’

‘Only an idiot and a genius break man-made laws; and they are the nearest to the heart of God.’

‘It is only when you are pursued that you become swift.’

‘If all they say of good and evil were true, then my life is but one long crime.’

‘When you see a man led to prison say in your heart, “Mayhap he is escaping from a narrower prison.” And when you see a man drunken say in your heart, “Mayhap he sought escape from something still more unbeautiful.’

‘Oftentimes I have hated in self-defence; but if I were stronger I would not have used such a weapon.’

‘How stupid is he who would patch the hatred in his eyes with the smile of his lips.’

‘Strange that we all defend our wrongs with more vigour than we do our rights.’

‘Should we all confess our sins to one another we would all laugh at one another for our lack of originality.’

‘Hate is a dead thing. Who of you would be a tomb?’

‘They spread before us their riches of gold and silver, of ivory and ebony, and we spread before them our hearts and our spirits; and yet they deem themselves the hosts and us the guests.’

‘The most pitiful among men is he who turns his dreams into silver and gold.’

‘Strife in nature is but disorder longing for order.’

‘If it were not for our conception of weights and measures we would stand in awe of the firefly as we do before the sun.’

‘Mayhap a funeral among men is a wedding feast among the angels.’

‘The obvious is that which is never seen until someone expresses it simply.

‘Perhaps time’s definition of coal is the diamond.’

‘Fame is the shadow of passion standing in the light.’

‘Every man is the descendant of every kind and every slave that ever lived.’

I trust that this has given you some insight into my life, and I hope that you will take a closer look at what you read, and why. Feel free to share your thoughts with me.

Happy reading.