To illustrate this point, I have a few examples. Here are two additional videos that focus on the ver many quotable quotes that comprise only 14 characters of the English alphabet. You can play, then press pause, so that the videos load better, before you watch them.

Here is Part 1

Here is Part 2

Here is the presentation on video, followed by the three dramatic stings. By the way, in the photo above, taken by Belinda Christie, we see David Malouf (author), The Honourable Virginia Judge MP, George Basher (actor), Regina Sutton (State Librarian and CEO), Jonar Nader, and Professor Fadia Ghossayn (President of the Australian Lebanese Foundation). After the fourth video below, is a transcript of the speech.

To explore the mysteries of the power of 14, click here.

Below are three additional videos of the dramatic music stings that were used on the night.

1) The walk-in that also featured the roll-call at the end, listing the names of everyone in the room.

2) The 2-minute energetic sting used to introduce the official speeches.

3) The 2-minute high-energy sting that preceded Jonar’s introduction.


Below is a transcript of Jonar’s lecture:

Greg Ward: Now, the video introduction that you have just seen concluded with these words. “I am alive like you and I am standing beside you. Close your eyes and look around, you will see me in front of you.” These were the words written by Gibran himself that were placed on his final place. And these beautiful and haunting words are truly words of encouragement.

So, with Gibran’s spirit undoubtedly here in front of us tonight, we arrive at the keynote presentation. But before we start, we need to ask a question. Why? Why did the Australian Lebanese Foundation invite Jonar Nader to present the keynote address? I mean there must have been dozens of scholars and academics and eminent dignitaries who could have been considered. So, what is it about Jonar that makes him the obvious choice?

Well, maybe it’s because both Jonar and Gibran have a great deal in common. Both men have mothers who are born in the village of Bsharri. Both Gibran and Jonar played in the same fields and they climbed the same trees, ate fruit from the same orchards, drank from the same streams.

As a boy, Gibran was taken to the United States. And as a boy, Jonar was brought here to Sydney. Both men could not speak English when they changed countries. Yet both men went on to become international authors and both write poetically. In fact, Jonar also writes about crime and terrorism and high technology and management. I’m sure that a great deal of you have been listening to Jonar on Arabic and English radio for the last 20 years.

Gibran was fond of painting. And Jonar too is an artist. Of the 24 paintings in Jonar’s home, Jonar painted all 24 of them. Both men infuriate people. Both upset people. Both challenge leaders in government and in industry. And both men have changed people’s lives with their literary work. Now, you heard the president of Australian Lebanese Foundation, Professor Fadia Ghossayn, say that Jonar was the little Gibran. We could think of no one better qualified to present the keynote address here tonight to celebrate Gibran’s life.

Ladies and gentlemen, to explore the genius of Gibran, we would like to call on our own resident genius. Ladies and gentlemen, please a big round of applause for Mr. Jonar Nader.

Jonar Nader: Thank, you Greg.

Greg Ward: You’re welcome.

Jonar Nader: Thank you. Beloved friends, distinguished guests, ladies and gentlemen, members of my family, it’s so lovely to see you. I wanted to just give out a little bit of a question here, was Gibran a genius? That’s a question that some gentlemen asked me the other day. So, that’s going to be the question I would post.

Now, you all know he’s fantastic. You all know he’s great. You all know he’s brilliant. But we called upon the proof because anyone can say, “Oh, you’re brilliant. You’re fantastic. But where is the proof?” So, I would like to talk to you about the proof today. But before we begin, just to those of us who might have forgotten where Lebanon is but you all know where Italy is, don’t you? OK.

Now, this is the Mediterranean Sea. And Lebanon has the best view of Mediterranean. We get this very straight wonderful view. Now, what does Lebanon look like? It’s sort of smothered away by it’s cozy being Lebanon surrounded by this wonderful nations around us. And let me just ask you, if we compare Lebanon with Australia, where do you think, look at this, where do you think that Lebanon would fit? No,no, not there. I’ll show you. So someone already said, “Really? I didn’t think of that mate?”

Jonar Nader: No, no, no. Here it is. This is Lebanon fitting in Australia for you.

If you want to start a new house and drive down, you wouldn’t even get to warm on it because it shows a short drive. And I did that everyday from where I live down and I think all of us as well.

Now, this was where I was born in the city space of Lebanon but my mother came from Bsharri and that was her environment.

Jonar Nader: Now, to find my mum’s house because I used to go there and I grew up there and I played there, this photo couldn’t quite get it so it’s actually to the bottom left of this photo and I have to hire a commercial Russian satellite to show you the house and zoom in on it. Now, this was where they grew up, our cousins, uncles, etc. Now, for you to understand how magnificent this property was, I need to peel away the front. And we used to go there and enjoy the lunches and the dinners and the most freshest of food. And if you thought that was fantastic, hold your breath as you look out the balcony and think.

If you were even brave a little bit more, you go further and further and further. Now, when you have these vantages, the next question has to be, if you were standing there, what would you see? And the views both in summer and winter were the most stunning of views. You can see why the people here in Lebanon and people from Lebanon absolutely love their country because whether it’s summer or winter, it is still likable. And I used to go there as a child and at the age of six, here I am.

Jonar Nader: Someone said to me, “Quick. Let’s go.” And I thought, oh another baiter because they’re always saying, quick, let’s go. And this time they took me to the museum of Gibran, Kahlil (Khalil) Gibran. And I was – there it is. That was the photo. And I was this young kid walking to this thing that was more Australian is now a beautiful museum. I thought, what is this? And people would cheer me. It’s like, “Wow! Jonar is being introduced to Gibran.” Well, thanks.

Since I was 13, I feel in love with his work and when I was 16 and to this day, I read his book, The Prophet, twice a year. And every time I read it, I think how stupid can I be? I’m still learning. And I read the book and I think, oh, I didn’t know that. I still learn from his work day and night.

So, let me now get to the question. Is/Was Gibran a genius? Well, let’s say if we can even prove this point. First, I believe that to be a genius you have to be an original thinker because if everyone is like you, where is the genius in that, right? So, was Gibran an original thinker? On marriage in The Prophet, when he wrote and we read and he says, “Stand together. You’re not tuned in together for the pillars of the temples stand apart.” He was saying that at the time when no one would dare and utter those words or think them. In a culture that was completely different, was that original or what? And was that daring or what? He said, “Even though they quiver with the same music, the strings of the lute are aligned.”

For a man so young, he died at 48 don’t forget, if I’m right. Is that right?

Audience: Yes.

Jonar Nader: For a man so young to dare to utter these words about marriage that says to me, he was thinking in a way that was original. That’s proof point number one.

Was this man ahead of his time? Well, you know, I was watching an interview with Buzz Aldrin, one of the men who were the first to walk on the moon and I remember Buzz Aldrin saying something like when we left this earth and I look back, I could not see the geography that I was taught at school. At school, we’re taught of these maps and he say, “But when I look at the earth, I couldn’t see the geography. It was just one beautiful planet, one beautiful place. Why on earth do we have conflict when we’re a little tiny dot in the universe?”

And now, this was a gentleman who had to spend $2 billion to get to the moon to work that out and here is Gibran 46 years prior having noticed this before the airplane, before the space shuttle, before anyone ever thought we’d ever get to the moon. Gibran’s mind was elevating to the satellite status. And he said, “You know, if you were to sit upon a cloud, you would not see the boundary line between one country than other nor the boundary standing between one farm than the next.” Gibran said, “It is a pity we cannot sit upon a cloud.” Basically saying, stupid people why do you fighting about? We’re all one nation. We’re all one country. We’re all one earth. We’re all one globe that should be pulling together.

So, do you think he was ahead of his time when long before even anyone could conceive of the rocket or the spaceship that if we actually can see that we really ought to just spend a moment to look down and see how funny it is.

He was shifting power before the Feminist Movement started and before the Women’s Rights Movement started. And he was talking about equality before anyone dare utter those words and he said, “Are you a husband who regards the wrongs he had committed as lawful but those of his wife as unlawful? At a time were men were dominant and dominating. Or are you a faithful companion whose wife is ever at his side sharing his every thought, rapture, and victory?” Long before the Women’s Movement, long before the Equal Rights Movement. This was a man way ahead of his time shifting power.

But as a fourth proof point, we ask, okay, is he a genius? I think you need to be somebody innovative. Well, were you? Was he innovative? Let us look at some of these questions. Back then and to this very day, everyone thinks that work is always work. And back then long before the management gurus and the total quality management and the quality insurance and long before all this play stuffing this of let’s not fight off, let’s hug each other. And I don’t know what they’re doing in this corporate thing is you know, you would go to them.

People saw work as they’re still seeing work sometimes as a burden. And way back then, was this innovative or not when he said, “People, work is love made visible.” And he was the guru talking about management staff engagement and talking about everything that you do you must do it with passion and with love. Not because it makes you feel better but because you’re doing it for someone who is your kin, your friend, your family. We are all one family. Build a house as if you’re building it for your mother.

What about proof point number five? Was he brave? Boy was he brave to speak like this at the time when no one even dared speak like this. You know they used to burn his books in the City Square. Here, we are celebrating the man that has touched our lives and back then some audacious person especially in the churches were burning his books. No disrespect, Your Excellency. I don’t think you did that today, would you?

Jonar Nader: Well, he certainly was brave and he knew that he would probably be killed if he went back home because he was back in the US and people were ostracizing him out of the country. And he loved it. I mean he was at pains with it and he was dying with it but he said, “I know now I’ve touched a nerve and when you touch a nerve, you’re getting close to something that’s called truth. And therefore, that’s okay. I’ll forego my beautiful homeland but I’d rather do what I have to do.” And he said of these empires who were dominating that when he said, “The ignorant nations arrested good men and turn them into this false.” Because that’s what they were trying to do things because they know he’s a nobody.

A country ruled by a tyrant persecutes those who try to free the people from the burden of slavery. They were persecuting him because he was saying, “Stop allowing anyone to oppress you.” And he who does not prefer exile to slavery is not free by any meter of freedom. He was free in his mind and he loved that, even if that meant being deprived from his very own home.

Was Gibran a genius? Well, a genius seems to be insightful. And was he being insightful when he said these words which I wish learned a long time ago. That’s what I tell you. I think I’m stupid because I’m still learning. I wish I knew this before. Gentlemen, how long did it take you to learn this? Gibran said, “Listen to a woman when she looks at you not when she speaks at you.”

Jonar Nader: It took me a long time to work that out. You see I’m so literal. I hear words but this got nothing to do with the words and the man sorted that out.

Let’s get proof point number seven going. Did he achieve amazing results? Well, someone would measure results then commercially but how many books did he sell? How many movies did he make? Was he in the top ten? And what does XYZ newspaper published his books out? It does not matter. He doesn’t care whether he sells one book or as it so happens now, millions of books. They did achieve amazing results and the result that I think is amazing is that Gibran could kiss you and hit you at the same time. He could love you and chastise you and slap you and yet, you know that he’s doing it with love. He was able to stir our mind into thinking into ways that no one even dared to utter. And yet, at the same time while he stirred our mind, he was touching our heart. That is the skill that I did not know too many writers can do.

He himself started personal challenges. And if you can’t handle that kind of personal challenge, you can never get to the stage of success or on the stage of genius. I mean as you know, anything you do, you’re all very successful people in this room. You know nothing is easy. Gibran look at you like, “Oh, you’re so successful.” Only you know the hundreds and millions of hours and heart and blood pressure and blood, sweat, and tears that you pour into it. And he himself had tremendous personal challenges, going to a new country, new language because his mum was sick and his brother died and his father was in jail. And like it was just very tumultuous and difficult but he himself as you know died only – and yes, he died unconscious to this hospital in New York, that’s how much pain he was in the medications back then weren’t as lucky as they are today. They’re not as great as they are today.

But did he know pain? My goodness, he said, “Pain is an unseen and powerful hand that breaks the skin of the stone in order to extract the pulp.” Now, my friend, Suzanne Mansour brought this to my attention and we discussed that he’s courageous. Can you see a man so in pain that he thinks that pain, first of all, is unseen. You can’t arrest it because if you know where it is, you can go and grab it and keep it. But no, it’s just all and it is unseen so that means you can’t do anything about it. It engulfs you and is so powerful that something all of a sudden can be ripped like as if it were a fig or a mango and the stone could be pulped. My goodness, that’s crushing. And he suffered that.

And yet, he did not give up. He did not go on at all. He did not sort of go, oh well. He persisted and persisted and would not give up and he continued. But did he continue? He continued to amaze. That was the most difficult of all. He could have, for example, said, “Let go of the war against these people.” But he didn’t. He could have said, “I’ll be a dictator and make it my way or no way. If you don’t do it my way, you’re in trouble.” He didn’t do that either.

Gibran stirred the world but he didn’t dominate anybody. He didn’t intimidate people. He didn’t hate a religious life. And he could have and he could have been very useful but he didn’t. He chose something hard. He wasn’t a police officer nor was he an outlaw. How did laws change the world for us? Law enforces help us to improve our lives. He was neither. I wish he chose one of those lives. It would have been easier. But no, he chose an even harder life.

Did he go into law? Did he become a judge? No. He could have done it and being a great one at it. He could have been a philanthropist or a generous man but he didn’t have the money. He could have built things and infrastructures. He couldn’t do it. Had he’d done that, it would have been easier. He chose an even harder path. He didn’t go for rallies and demonstrations and he didn’t enter parliament. What did he do? He could have done any of those and be powerful. But he chose the worst one of those and that is the art. The art is the most difficult way in which to communicate and address people. Yet, the most loving and the most penetrating as Honorable Virginia Judge mentioned.

We need to start speaking in culture rather than war and money and get into the hearts and minds of people because that’s where they live not in the bank down. And no disrespect to our friends in common who are banking the arrow bank.

Jonar Nader: But you know, James [Wakim CEO of Arab bank], you would agree, wouldn’t you? Family, love, and heart and not about how much money you’ve got.

So, he didn’t choose any of those. He chose the arts. And then he used to pass on his problem. Not only did he choose the arts, he chose the most difficult of all the arts. What did he choose? He chose writing. Of course, he was a painter too. But his painting could not exist without his works. I mean every work of art that he has produced is relevant to his poetry, to his philosophy. So, he was a writer.

I’m not saying to you that being a writer is the most difficult of all the arts. So, what a problem this man has put on his shoulders? Now, can I prove to you that writing is the most difficult of all the arts? That seems strange, doesn’t it? Dr Taouk, because anyone could pick up a pen and paper. Isn’t it fantastic? Anyone could write, ‘Roses are red, violets are blue, hello darling how are you’. I mean it’s very simple. Hey, go publish that.

Well, let’s see now. Can we prove this point? I think food is an art. And growing up with my mother who is here tonight, she’s the best cook in the world. I’m sure your mother is too. But to me, food is fantastic and she feeds me day and night I think well. Now, food is an art. You must admit, you can’t say, “Well, chef there you go. Here are nice pieces of lettuce. Do something.” But the thing is, that though food is delicious, the beginning points of food come from Mother Nature, come from God. And we take what God has given us and we turn it into delicious stuff, order fillet and everything else you want.

Jonar Nader: Now – but you know, I don’t know if I told you but I know on TV that have these shows about a great chef or whatever. I mean what are you boasting about? God made the tomato. Who do you think you are? So yes, of course, we have a good chefs and bad chefs but seeing what they’ve got to begin with, they have a wonderful foundation to begin with.

What does the write have to begin with? I could ask you. He didn’t have Mother Nature’s own beauty that gives the shift that would lift a good starting point. What does the write had? The writer has unnatural language. I look at a human and I think bones and fingers and teeth and eyes, isn’t it amazing that the biology of a human, can’t you see? Can you hear and feel but yet, I don’t understand how we’re born but not language.

Language has to be taught and you have to learn it and we have had thousands and still have thousands of languages. And now, a writer has to communicate to you, to me through an unnatural process. There are only three natural things to do with communication and one of them is cry. I find that funny too. Can you imagine a meeting with God? He says, “I want to create this human and I want him to cry.” Someone like me would say, what for? What’s crying all about? That’s one. That’s the only thing we’re in common. The same thing we have in common is screaming.

Of all the languages in the world, we all know screaming. I think that’s a very universal piece of language. And when screaming, it’s when the brain goes into overdrive and cannot think anymore and goes into its natural state.

Now, watch this little video here of this girl on the right-hand side. She gets to the point where she doesn’t know what to say. Her natural instincts take over. Watch how she screams in this show.

Jonar Nader: That’s what happens. You just get to a point of no more words and that’s the natural state. And the other one is laughter. It’s a very funny little engineering thing that we laugh, we cry, and we scream. They’re the only things we have in common.

And so, the writer doesn’t have beautiful tomatoes and all these things to work with. The writer has nothing. And has to work with a manufactured language to somehow then go into meaning. And somehow, I’m supposed to think it, feel it, and then somehow express it to you and give it to you. And while you are on a train or on a bus, you somehow going to do the same thing and I don’t know. That makes it very difficult. So, by comparison to cooking, the writer has it tough.

What about writing in comparison to say, the fine artists? Indeed, the fine artist can take a simple piece of lead and turn it into a lovely illustration of what can keep cook silver and what life was like. But the great thing about this is that the artist has the privilege of color to somehow show we can mix and mix and create a wonderful creations and I’m not putting down the arts in dispense at all but I’m saying, isn’t the fine artist so lucky that they have color. What does Gibran had? What does the writer had? They don’t have anything other than maybe the exclamation mark, maybe the question mark. And if you want to be so bold, you can put color but only show what that does. You’re restricted.

What about then – let’s compare the writer to the engineer and the architect. All it takes is a great mind to build the Harbour Bridge, the Opera House, the wonderful. Imagine the beauty that this was developed so beautifully through architecture. But I say to you, the author has it tougher than the architect because when this bridge was built, it was built once. You don’t have people driving up to, you know, North Sydney and they get out their hammers and tools to build the bridge each time.

But for a writer, we may present the book to you, you have to read it and construct it in your head every single time. Every single passage when it comes to any of Gibran’s book, one has to read it and construct it in their head every single. That makes it difficult for the writer because I don’t know where you’re at, what you’re thinking about, your level of understanding, and the writer is useless, pointless. It’s a dead piece of paper until you reconstruct it every single time. That makes it pretty tough.

Then we have to compare the writer with the movie maker. Now, in the movie world, you’ve got multimedia, special effects, sounds, color, movement, and many, many actors, location. Isn’t that marvelous? And yes, moviemaking is difficult. It’s rich. But it’s so much easier because you’ve got all the weakness of multimedia and computer animation. What does the writer have? Twenty-six letters of the alphabet if you’re just thinking in English.

Now, you got to take 26 letter of the English alphabet and somehow put them and give them to someone who’s on a train or on a bus, somewhere far away from you and that person to reconstruct the bridge in their head and fill it – and change their life where they will change their world with it. But I have to say, you don’t have 26 letters of the English alphabet. If you take some of the greatest speeches of the world… Those of you who do crosswords, you can now have new hobby. You grab any finest speech you like. Like this Abraham Lincoln’s Gettysburg address, the last line says, at the last line, Government of the people, for the people, by the people.” But that’s not 26 letters. It’s 44 characters but if you actually look at those, there are 11 E’s and 6 O’s.

So, when you strip all the doubles away, you end up with not 44 characters but simply 14. And somehow, with 14 characters, I’ve got a marshal, an army, or stop a war or change your life with 14 characters of the alphabet somewhere when you are on a train and I can’t be there with you, and expect you to rebuild it in your mind that is difficult. You’ve all heard this.

Jonar Nader: Indeed, these were the words from Gibran himself. And Gibran wrote these words when John F. Kennedy was eight years old. And John F. Kennedy used those words but he was ill-advised because if JFK was saying, “My fellow citizens, ask not …” to these Americans, “… what your country can …” Gibran wasn’t – didn’t mean that. This is from a long essay. It’s a beautiful essay called New Frontier and you can find it on internet. Gibran was actually to the likes of President JFK. How dare the President turned it back to the people. Gibran was saying to the president, don’t you get into public power and position and work thing that this is for you, mate. You’re there to serve your people.” And the next sentence was, “And if you are a member of the church or clergy for goodness sake, you’re not there to fatten your belly you’re there to serve the others.”

Truly, these are Gibran’s words. I could tell you what he said about corporations and banks but really he is saying, “Look outwards and stop looking inwards.”

Okay. So, we’ve got 26 letters or 14 letter of the English alphabet that I have to string together or the writer does and gives them to you and they’re there until you construct them and that has to evoke emotion and evoke action. Is that hard work or what? Because it could have been as easy as starting a war, wouldn’t it? If it was just kind of a detailed as essay. Is that difficult or what?

Okay. I know there are mathematicians in the room who would say, “No, no, no. Math is much harder.” Math is definitely harder than English and writing. Well, that’s handle it with this question. Indeed, when you look at an equation or any sort of problem at school, you would see something like this, X minus A times X minus B times X minus C time X minus D, and X minus E. Now, if you have to sit there and work that out, you’d have to write this stuff like this and the teacher would give you ten out of ten. That’s fantastic. And then you’d go to the next grade and the teacher said, “And now, you multiply that by X minus F.”

Then you broke it well and look like this. And then when you get to a little bit higher, you know, as far as 15 years old, when you get to 15 years old and they give you this equation and say, go all the way to X minus Z. Well, to go to all the way to Z, there would be 134 million phrases and that’s about 670,000 pages so it’s easy to say math is much harder. But no, math is easier because when I say to you, what’s 100 times 2, you don’t sit there counting 101, 102, do you? We have shortcuts. And you know when I say to you 100 times 2, you know it’s 200. You don’t sit there working it up. And when I show you – if you show me to sit there and write 670,000 pages because if you did, it would look like this. Please now write 670,000 pages. You wouldn’t. A child of 15 cannot read those books and work it out in ten minutes.

Yet, an author who writes a complete shelf of 670,000 pages. Is there a shortcut to literature? What is the shortcut? There isn’t. And no child of 15 can read those books and work it out in ten minutes.

Music – hang on, perhaps music is harder than writing. Well, when musician writes something or composes something, they don’t need your keyboard and say, “There you go, darling. I composed something for you.” No. They play it for you. And not only the musicians play one note at a time they put their entire 10-key designed keyboard and play.

A writer cannot put ten anything and play because if a writer has a thought and wanted another thought on top of it, they would like this. It’s just impossible. But a musician can have 10, 20, 30, 60 pieces in an orchestra to play rhythm. And the other fantastic thing is this. That in music, you have a beat. When a writer writes, you are far away from them. And here we are, decades later from Gibran, decades later.

And we are expected to read Gibran’s work and know the beat and that is hard. So, it takes a very skilled writer to be able to write and quiver and beat your heart so you can get into the rhythm of the philosophy.

Now, how many people in the audience can play this? This is called the tabla [drum]. And this gives us the beat. And I have for you an expert in this area who is going to demonstrate how this works so I can show you how in fact music is so much easier than writing.

Ladies and gentlemen, would you please welcome Nabi Charr to play the tabla for us. Come on, Nabi.

Jonar Nader: Show us how this works.

Jonar Nader: And now, we’re going to add some percussion so we’ll bring out the Daff [tambourine]. Khalid, please join us on stage.

Jonar Nader: And for the soul, we need the nai. The nai is the flute. Would you please welcome, Tony Chalitta on the nai.

Jonar Nader: And the most beautiful of Arabic instruments will be oud [guitar]. Please welcome Nabil.

Jonar Nader: We need one more, the violin. Please welcome, Emad.

Jonar Nader: Thank you. A round of applause, ladies and gentlemen.

Jonar Nader: Now, a writer doesn’t have the richness of agony and agony and agony, They have to work with the 14 letters or the 26 letters and they have to work it one at a time. There’s no such thing of an orchestra playing multiple 10 notes at a time, 60 people at a time. The writer has to do it one little bit at a time.

So, what about the sculptor? Is sculpture harder than writing? When you say the brilliant thing about sculpture is that it is in fact three-dimensional but you can start looking at a piece of art from any – which way you like, three-dimensional whereas the writer has to suffer the flat process of one word at a time.

Now, I’ll show you what would happen. If the writer gets it in the wrong order, you see with the sculpture, you can start anywhere you like, with writing you cannot start anywhere you like. You have to start at the same spot because if you start to mean something, you sound a great teacher and if you don’t get those in the right order, you’re insane and a great teacher.

You might go to your bank and say, “Really, I’d buy the debit card.” But then you might actually accidentally say that I have bad credit. Sequence is vital. And you have to be patient enough with the sequence.

Now, the most wonderful of pieces of architecture in terms of sculpture for me is the tree. It’s a wonder I don’t fall down when walking because I’m always looking up and I think trees are just absolutely marvelous when it comes to sculpture and God’s creation.

Now, the tree of Lebanon is the cedar tree, the ariz as we call it. And you know, Lebanon’s name comes from this start, from this vision that we see what. And the word Lebanon comes from the word lubnan which means white. And this was the vision of this white. Lebanon is the only country in the Middle East that doesn’t have a desert. And whether it’s summer or whether it’s winter, it is divine to see this cedar tree. And this is the tree that really represents Lebanon on the flag, the Lebanese flag.

Now, there was a Lebanese cedar tree in Sydney at the Royal Botanic Gardens that was donated to Sydney 100 years, 126 years ago and this tree is the one, donated from Lebanon and here it is in Sydney but unfortunately the roots are going to salt water and had to be chopped down. So, word got out and this lady in red you see was interrupting. Someone was trying to take great photo and then she’s saying, “What? They’re tearing that down?” And that lady was Lama Mourad and she called her husband in and he comes in a little bit later and he says, “Oh my goodness, how could we chop this tree down?” He knew it had to be done. But he also heard it can be pulped and he said, “Not over my dead body. You wouldn’t pulp it.”

So he waited until they chopped it down. And what did he do with it? He took it home. And he rescued this tree all the way from Lebanon. It stood in Sydney for 126 years and he began to ponder and write and think and draw until he came up with some sketches.

Now, Tom Mourad has been a sculptor in his head since the age of 8 and he entered the profession at the age of 19. And he then began to sculpt. And would you like to see what he had sculpted? Ladies and gentlemen, I will unveil to you the wonderful work of the very cedar tree by Tom Mourad.

Jonar Nader: Now, this particular piece is not from that tree but these three pieces here are, and this is the first one, and Lama Mourad and Tom Mourad are with us today. You can check on table 25. We can give them a round of applause.

Jonar Nader: Lama has the job also of naming them and she called this Rebirth. And this is one piece from the cedar tree. In fact, Tom has 50 pieces from that cedar tree.

Now, as I conclude, as I conclude, Gibran himself knew that writing was difficult. He knew that communication was difficult. And his only solution at the end was to say to his friends, “I wish we could condense the language to seven words.” He knew that it was very difficult to communicate and still tried his best and he succeeded with the art.

What were those seven words that he believes are at the core of humanity? I should share them with you and will encourage to speak about this with your friends. Let us see which were the seven words that Gibran chose, you, I, give, God, love, beauty, and earth.

Well, ladies and gentlemen, I hope that in this short time that I brought you along with me to the proof points that Gibran in my books, he was a genius. There are a number of speeches beyond me. We assume you’re enjoying your dessert and I thank you very much for having me.

Greg Ward: Ladies and gentlemen, I would ask you once again, please put your hands together for Mr. Jonar Nader.

Greg Ward: Now, Jonar did say that there are many speeches after him but we cannot let Jonar get away without thanking him here on the stage. So, I would like to welcome here to the stage The University of Sydney’s Executive Director of External Affairs and Officer of Foundations, Marion Theobald. Come and join us please.

Marion Theobald: Thank you very much. That was not a keynote. That was a multimedia extravaganza. I would just like on behalf of The University of Sydney and the Australian Lebanese Foundation, everybody who’s here tonight to say thank you very much to Jonar for a wonderful keynote address. And to also thank you for all the commitment and care and passion that he’s put to making tonight possible.

Jonar Nader: Thank you very much. Wow. [Jonar reads the inscription from the gift he was given, being a large book from the Gibran Museum] ‘These are the children of Lebanon; they are those who migrate with nothing but courage in their hearts and arms, but who return with wealth in their hands and a wreath of glory upon their heads.’ Thank you very much.

Here is the transcript:

Female Speaker: Why losing friends and infuriating people may actually help you succeed at work.

Don: That story, of course, is coming up. For those have heard or maybe even read the book, “How to Win Friends and Influence People,” but there’s a new book out called “How to Lose Friends and Infuriate People.” Jonar Nader wrote the book. He joins us this morning live to talk about it. Good morning, Jonar. Thank you for joining us.

Jonar Nader: Hi, Don. Thanks for having me.

Don: Hey, the title of the book, of course, sounds like it would be a direct opposition to Dale Carnegie’s book that most of us are familiar with. But it’s really not the case as I’ve thumbed through it. In a nutshell, what is it really all about?

Jonar Nader: Well, it’s about following your heart and doing what has to be done. The philosophies of old have done a great job. And Dale Carnegie did a great job. But today we have to learn opposites. We were taught things like conflict avoidance. We also need to understand when do I actually stand up and count. We were taught things like focus, focus, focus, but now we also need to do opposites simultaneously. Like we need to be aware while focused simultaneously. We need to understand fear and courage simultaneously. We need to know when to be patient – because patience is a virtue….

Don: Right.

Jonar Nader: …but at the same time impatience is also wonderful.

Don: Let’s talk about some of the chapters. Chapter 9: Forget about Teamwork.

Jonar Nader: Yeah.

Don: It doesn’t – it doesn’t sound really good, but explain what that means.

Jonar Nader: Look, you know, teamwork is something that’s so important, but what do people think? They think teamwork is about getting people together who can – who are happy together and who can play golf together. But, no, teamwork is not about getting people together; it’s about getting the right people together. So, we shouldn’t pretend that just by being happy that somehow we’re going to, well, get on. No. You need to construct teams that work in the same way you construct ingredients…

Don: Move one more chapter ahead. Chapter 10: It’s Not What You Give, But What You Take.

Jonar Nader: Yeah? Well, you know, what do our bosses say? They say, “I hereby empower you.” You cannot say to someone, “You are no longer scared of spiders,” but what you can do is say, “I’ll take away the bureaucracy, the red tape, the stupidity.” By taking away the stupidity, now people can become self-empowered.

Don: We’re running out of time. I did want to say that I did enjoy reading some of it, especially the Balcony of Life, which is in Chapter 1. We’ll leave people hanging there so they might want to pick up the book. Thank you very much for joining us this morning…

Jonar Nader: Yeah, thank you.

Don: …and talking about your book. Interesting title, that is for sure.

Jonar Nader: Thanks, Don.

Don: Thank you Mr. Nader.

Female Speaker: So, in light of that, the truth can come out about us and whether we really like one another or not.

Don: Yeah. It’s definitely a – I love the title, you know, and the book, yeah.

Female Speaker: “How to Lose Friends and Infuriate People.” Alexandra does that every day.

Don: When she….

Female Speaker: You know.

Don: … has a bad forecast, yeah.

Female Speaker: That’s why, you know, I’m totally conflict avoidant and, Kairley, you’re the opposite, so this book is really good for you.

Kairley: It’s true.

Female Speaker: You go right in for the kill.

Kairley: I know, it’s my job.

Female Speaker: And you’re good at it. All right, well, good morning, everyone.

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Female: Our next guest is an Australian author who seems to be taking his own literary advice with strangely successful results. Jonar Nader is the man behind the bestselling book, How to Lose Friends and Infuriate People. And he’s recently infuriated publishers in the US, winning a legal challenge that would have forced his book off the shelves. Jonar is now back in Australia with big plans for the future and he joins us in the studio.

Jonar, good morning.

Jonar Nader: Hi, Tracey.

Female: Did you exactly win that legal – we should explain this legal challenge. This was the estate, the family of Dale Carnegie whose original book title, How To Win Friends and Influence People, you kind of borrowed from for your book. And that …

Jonar Nader: I hardly did borrow anything but they took exceptions.

Female: You didn’t.

Jonar Nader: They were jealous and they said that I was unfair competition which was the most flattering thing any big humungous publisher can say to me. So, they said, withdraw off the market and I engaged lawyers both here and in the US and we did our homework and realized they actually have nothing to stand on. They eventually I think found that out for themselves but the ball is still in their court. But under great threats, I still went to the US to launch the book.

Female: Okay. So, if in fact, they decide to revive legal action and if you lose, do you have to hand over every cent you’ve made out of this book potentially?

Jonar Nader: Oh well, yes sure. But if they lose, I’ll probably be earning me several million dollars too for the aggravation because then they’re just causing trouble. And our letter back to them said, this is nothing but frivolous and that’s the best word we could find in our legal terms.

Female: Alright. So, the book is doing okay then.

Jonar Nader: Well, brilliantly well and it’s doing okay not because of anything to do with Carnegie. Its doing okay because it stands well on its own and people love actually what it’s saying in this modern world.

Female: Alright. You’re going to do a new series of books, How to Infuriate Among Other People, Lawyers, Teachers, Fat People, and Women. Why do you want to do that exactly?

Jonar Nader: Well, I think the industry desperately needs good old-fashioned publishing values, which says, when you publish a book …

Female: How to really annoy people.

Jonar Nader: No, we’ve got to get the facts up similar with – similarly with lawyers. You know, if you ever dealt with a lawyer, you know how expensive it is and I have a lawyer writing a book called How to Lose Friends and Infuriate Lawyers or words to that effect, How to Lose Friends and Infuriate Teachers. Young people …

Female: Yes, how – how – why?

Jonar Nader: Why?

Female: How and why.

Jonar Nader: Well, let’s take young people and How to Lose Friends and Infuriate Teachers. I left school at 14 and I still mix with young people. They are tormented. They think HSC is the be all and end all. They’re committing suicide. They’re just depressed and then they go back to university and they say, ‘Oh, I’ll do a degree.’ And then they finished the degree and they’ll go and do an MBA. And I go, ‘What for?’ ‘Oh well, I don’t know.’ And the prime of their life is gone and they really still don’t understand what life is about.

So, there is a need out there for people to understand the truths and when you actually expose the truths that infuriates lot of people because there are two sides of the fence.

Female: So, are you going to tell young people not to bother with tertiary education? Is that basically what you’re saying?

Jonar Nader: Well, I’m going to say, follow your heart first and do what you know has to be done and don’t just go to school because, ‘Oh well, that’s the next thing to do. Oh well, I’m 18. I think I’ll go to uni.’ I mean whatever for? If you say I love this subject and I want to know more about it, sure go to uni but don’t go there because it’s automatic because the system says so because at the end of it, you come out, you’re 30 something at the prime of your life and you’re still a nobody. I think life can be enjoyed better than that.

Female: Okay. So basically, your publisher now.

Jonar Nader: Yes.

Female: And a professional stirrer of the possum.

Jonar Nader: No, I’m not a professional stirrer. I’m actually saying, ‘Excuse me people, there’s a life to be lived, there’s truth to be known. Let’s do it in this very fast-paced world.’ How do young people discern between right and wrong these days? How can they – unless we teach them to be critical.

Female: Okay. We’ll watch for those books.

Jonar Nader: Thanks.

Female: Thanks, Jonar.

Male: And then there will be How to Lose Friends and Infuriate TV Execs. Jonar Nader, and we’ve got more of Today after this break.

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Female: Give the man a microphone and he will give you his opinion. Jonar C. Nader among other things, he is a lecturer, public speaker, broadcaster and author. Based in Sydney, he is in Hamilton on the series of lectures around the country.

Jonar Nader: On this occasion I’m looking at the future. So, I’m being a futurist and sometimes I’m a business executive who helps people understand technology and society. Sometimes I talk to governments and help them understand about fraud and the next major impacts of technology and fraud. And I also have a book called How to Lose Friends and Infuriate People and that book is about leadership and I am involved very heavily in training people about what leadership means, how it applies to personal development and also business and corporate development.

Female: It’s that book a guide to personal achievement, management and leadership that has ironically infuriated a US company that was built on the back of the popular 1930s book, How to Win Friends and Influence People. Lawyers for Dale Carnegie & Associates sent Nader a cease and desist letter saying they object to the use of the book title. The self-published Lebanese author has been forced to practice what he preaches.

Jonar Nader: Where it said is that they’ve made all sorts of threats. They’ve said that they will take this until the end and I have said I’ll take this until the end and let’s see. Interestingly, this is a test of character because my readers are now saying, ‘Well Jonar, you tell us to stand up for our rights, what are you going to do about it?’ And sure enough, I’ve done lots about it.

Female: Nader says he’ll fight the empire with all he’s got. Carlie Kirkwood, Prime Local News.

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Tracy: Well, fledgling author, Jonar Nader, is feeling the heat of international law on his shoulders after upsetting publishing giant Simon & Schuster. His book, How to Lose Friends and Infuriate People has got up the nose of the family of motivational guru, Dale Carnegie, who penned the bestseller How to Win Friends and Influence People. Lawyers for the Carnegie stipulate Nader is playing off the title of Carnegie’s book and they want it pulp before it goes on sale in the United States.

Well, Jonar Nader joins us now. Jonar, good morning.

Jonar Nader: Hello, Taylor – Tracy.

Tracy: What’s your book about?

Jonar Nader: It’s about doing what you believe is right, doing what has to be done. It’s about leadership, management, and personal achievement. And so unfortunately, in this day and age, we move too quickly to play games and I say, if you follow your heart, do what you have to do even if you have to lose friends and infuriate people. So actually, the book, it has nothing to do with Carnegie’s book. It’s about the modern world.

Tracy: So, it’s an – it’s an inspirational self-help book then? Is it?

Jonar Nader: It – well, that’s one step of it. The next step is actually, it gives you guidance about how to survive the modern age, the digital age, the network 12 which is a whole new world we need to learn about. It’s about teamwork and all the things that people keep hearing about except it gives you my perspective on it which I believe is totally opposite to what we’ve been taught.

Tracy: Okay. Digital and modern age aside, inspiration self-help book, inspirational self-help book written by Dale Carnegie, very similar sort of concept, aren’t they?

Jonar Nader: Well, there are a million and one books on that kind of subject. I believe mine is different and it’s doing a good job out there.

Tracy: But one’s called How to Win Friends and Influence People and the other is called How to Lose Friends and Infuriate People. You’ve clearly played on Carnegie’s title, haven’t you?

Jonar Nader: Not on purpose. I was actually in a meeting once and someone accused of – he said, ‘Jonar, you don’t know how to win friends and influence people, do you?’ And I exclaimed, ‘No.’ But it shows things like I know how to lose friends and infuriate people and that was the inspiration. It was having to put up with that nonsense in the boardroom and I thought, it’s about time we actually spoke up from this wishy washy nonsense. There’s no time for it.

Tracy: Did you know about the title of Carnegie’s book?

Jonar Nader: Yes, I did. Yes, I did. But what gives them the right to an opposites. You know, if you write a book called How to Lose Weight and I’ll write a book called How to Put on Weight, all of a sudden, doing the opposite of – I’m speaking the opposite. How can they stop me? On the other hand though, they have money and they’re trying but I’m fighting it.

Tracy: Did you not expect them to bite you?

Jonar Nader: No, because I know that the book has absolutely nothing to do with it. It doesn’t mention it at all. It has no similarity in structure nor content. It is a modern book for the modern age. It has a good clever title because the title actually reflects the book itself. The book is about losing friends and infuriating people if that’s what you have to do.

Tracy: You self-published, have you got the money to fight a big publisher in the United States?

Jonar Nader: No, no, I don’t but I’ve got the energy and I’ve got the motivation and I will do everything I can until my last cents. Of course, sometimes law is about money and not about justice but I’ll give it my best shot.

Tracy: Alright. We’ll wait and see how it turns out.

Jonar Nader: Yes.

Tracy: Thanks for your time.

Jonar Nader: Thank you.

Male: Jonar Nader and news weather is next here on the Today program.

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Female: So, what are your credentials in life?

Jonar Nader: Well, I don’t like the term credentials because what you’re saying to me is what’s your brand because if I said to you, I’m an Oxford boy that means, you know, I’m lardie da and my parents are rich. And if I said to you, I’m a Scotts boy or a Harvard boy, what does that mean? It means it’s a brand, right? And then people say, what country are you from? Some countries have brands. Isn’t it funny that the US of A if it were a brand that could be trademark, it would sit next to Dunhill and Cartier. It has this image but when you delve deep down and scratch the surface, what is it? Yes, the US is a fine country but it’s got its own pretty messy problems.

Female: Yes.

Jonar Nader: But it projects a beautiful image. Now – so therefore, when people ask me, what’s your business card, who do you report to, what company do you work for, where do you …

Female: Where do you come from sort of thing?

Jonar Nader: Yes. They’re trying to pigeon-hole me. And that’s why you’ll find on my business card, it actually says post-tentative virtual surrealist.

Female: Now, what is a post-tentative virtual surrealist? Did you make that up or what?

Jonar Nader: Yes, because again, I’ve always been either the youngest or the oldest or something. So, in my corporate life, I was always the youngest manger. So, I have a team of people twice my age, three times my age that would be reporting to me. I’ll be the Senior Manager but I never used to boost about it. So, we’re going to a meeting, everyone would be of equal standing, we’d all do a great job, and I was just humble and sit in the background. And they’d ignore me because I was a genius. So, they thought, meaning they’re outsiders.

Female: Yes.

Jonar Nader: My team knew that I was the leader but I let them have the power. And so, wherever I went, people would want to know what title have you got, who do you report? And I thought, what do you want to know that for? So they can abuse me, they can see if I’m useful to them? And if I don’t have a good title, they’ll just move on and have a nibbly with somebody else. So one day, this lady insisted. She said, ‘But what are you? Are you a clerk, a manager, a director, what are you?’ I said, ‘I’m a post-tentative virtual surrealist.’ And she said, ‘Oh, that’s really interesting.’

Female: Yes .

Jonar Nader: She was so stupid like, you know, these abusers who go around networking. And that title stuck and we’ve made a lot of fun with it but I use it now.

Female:

Jonar Nader: I use it now to sort of say, ‘Stop. I don’t have a title. I’m a nobody. I’m not a dentist. I’m not a doctor. I’m not a Harvard. I’m not an Oxford. I am me. You take it or leave it.’ And furthermore, what I know is based on what I have gone in search of and what the blessings have come my way to learn. I didn’t sit in a lecture theater to be told about the facts of life. I went out and felt them. And now, people said to me, ‘Gee, you’re so lucky and whatever.’ What do you mean lucky? You know, I left school at 14 and had terrible, terrible times growing up. So, I made my own success and I made my own life and I’m still learning. And everyday I learn. You can see me in libraries until midnight. You will catch me researching things like – and that’s life. What do I need doing an MBA for or PhD to impress whom? So, this …

Female: Because not only were you high up in the corporate world, you’ve also not only written this book but you’re quite interested for precise writings for dictionary, Butterworths legal dictionary as well, Formula One racing magazines. I mean, you’ve done it all in the writing world, haven’t you?

Jonar Nader: I’ve done all sorts of writing, yes. And I’ve interviewed the most famous to the most humble and the most outcast. Writing was an interesting thing for me because English is my third language and when I got to Australia at a very young age, I couldn’t speak English. I didn’t know how to go around the place. I didn’t play cricket. I didn’t eat Vegemite like they all used to do in Australia.

Female: Or skip cornflakes.

Jonar Nader: Nothing. And I was a real outsider. And there wasn’t that much compassion in the classroom from the teachers down. And so, I was forced to learn English the hard way. In so doing, I fell in love with language because now I understood English, a bit of French, I understood Arabic, and I realized that in fact, the brain works in a very strange way because the way you think in Italian is not the way an English person thinks. It’s really weird. And so, I started writing because I love words. I wrote for fashion magazines, art magazines, architecture magazines, became editor of those magazines, and really enjoyed it.

Now, writing was always a hobby. And to this day, I’m an author but I don’t really think I’m an author. I’m an educator. I’m out there to make change, to do things, to pass on my experiences. So, I didn’t write the book to make money. And as you know, most authors can’t make money and you know, not unless you’re selling in the millions. And that’s pretty tough for us Aussies and New Zealanders, you know, we’re not exactly in the millions stakes. And you know, a lot of hype to sell a few million books, but I’m going to the US on the 23rd of June anyway.

Female: Now, the thing is with this book, I mean it’s – I would mention briefly the Carnegie, incredibly I think the one thing and it’s that what a lot of people have never heard of you is the title, How to Lose Friends and Infuriate People. And a lot of people and their all thoughts have been, I mean, ‘What’s – what’s this guy on?’

Jonar Nader: Yes.

Female: Losing friends, I mean why did you come up with this title?

Jonar Nader: Oh well, several ways. First by the way, it is a frivolous title but that’s the attraction. In the world of marketing, you have to, you know, standout. But actually, I didn’t engineer that title. As you know, there’s a famous book called How to Win Friends and Influence People.

Female: Now, are you sort of doing a back stab at that?

Jonar Nader: No, you know, what had happened is incorporate life, I used to have bosses who’d come around with a stack of books and they’d throw the books down and say, ‘I want you to work on this.’ The next month, they come with another book called The Seven Habits of Highly Effective People, or Service, America, or The One Minute Manager. And I, ‘Look, you know, we’re schizophrenics. Which do you want us? You know, you keep finding.’ They come and say, ‘Oh, find the way.’ You can’t find the way in a book, you know, like that. And he says, “Try the things at this.’ And people used to, when we had the How to Win Friends and Influence People month, he’d – we had a meeting and during that meeting, someone was so furious with me. They were angry because I wouldn’t go their way. I wouldn’t sign the program they wanted me to sign off on. And I thought, what’s the point of employing me as a Marketing Director, giving me responsibility on millions of dollars if I can’t make the decision? If you want to make the decision then why do you employed me?

Female: Exactly.

Jonar Nader: What basis of expertise you’re bringing to the table? So, this manager said to me in fury, ‘Jonar, you sure know how to win friends and influence people.’ And I exclaimed in anger, ‘No, but it sure seemed like I know how to lose friends and infuriate people.’ Because everybody in the boardroom was absolutely furious that I wouldn’t go their way. And I thought, well …

Female: And the title was born.

Jonar Nader: The title was born and then I realized there and then as I’d known all my life in the school bus, in the school ground that if you stick to your guns, if you follow your heart, I mean, I never smoke and the flak I used to get at school for not going around and smoking or popping tablets or drinking. I mean, kids used to bring little Jim Beam bottles into their pockets and when the teacher wasn’t looking and everyone thought that was cute. The weirdest thing is I left school at 14, 10 years later there was a school reunion, pure chance I knew about. I went to this school reunion and the same kids who used to pull that bottles like these had come with two bottles in their hands, a balanced diet.

And I – it clicked and I thought, what seemed harmless… And these guys have PhDs and they were studying medicine but they were now brickie’s labourours, unemployed, and bums. And I resisted and I paid the price for resisting. I was teased every step of the way. I didn’t get a tattoo when they got a tattoo. I didn’t do my earring when they got the earring. I didn’t – they used to – you know, all these rituals and we used to – we thought that people in the highlands are barbaric, you know, all these barbaric things but the rituals that go on everyday in school, in society, at work, the way people carry on, if you want to resist that, you’re going to have to lose friends and infuriate people by accident not by choice.

So, if you want to – live true to yourself, be prepared to lose friends. I don’t say be rude. I don’t say be, you know, bombastic about it. But if you can’t stand firm – people are carrying on about our Prime Minister in Australia as to how they’re saying, why isn’t he apologizing for the aborigines, et cetera. I don’t know and it doesn’t matter for this discussion. But what matters is this guy has been consistent in his approach ever since he became Prime Minister and everyday, they hound him. You know, they talked about sexual harassment going down and going darling, no means no. The guy has said no and they keep harassing him to change his mind. The PM has a firm mind. Like it or not, don’t vote for him.

Female: Yes.

Jonar Nader: But somehow they think that the more you nag, the more someone is going to change their mind. But the more you embarrass them on the front page, that’s what I called character. That’s what I called firmness. That is a brand. A brand is something that is immovable and unshakeable. And so, should the personality be. If I know you, you should be who you are. Of course, you grow and develop for the better, please. Not this wishy washy being. Oh, will you marry me? Yes. Forever? Yes. And then next year, I want a divorce. But you said you’d never leave me. Oh, that’s different.

Female: That – that was – that was last year.

Jonar Nader: Yes. Well then, hang on. I speak English and you said you will never leave me. What do you mean? Never until 12 months? Speak English or don’t speak at all.

Female:

Jonar Nader: And so, don’t – you know, don’t be so flippant with – with words because words become thoughts and thoughts are who you are. And we are – say, we are what we think you know. So, what are you thinking? What are you saying? And that’s why I deconstruct a lot of notions. People talk about teamwork. I say, there’s no such thing as teamwork. People talk about empowerment. I say, no one can empower you and I explain why. They talk about motivation. I say, there is no such thing as motivation. You have to understand these things. We use them so flippantly and so loosely.

Female: When – one thing – what’s one thing you want people should take away from your book? People that come in today and get it or just want to get it?

Jonar Nader: Well, if you – if you force me to give you one thing, I’d say this, that if someone stole you a lovely gold watch or your car, you’d do something about it. You will do something about it. When someone steals your time they are stealing your life, what are you doing about it?

Female: Yes.

Jonar Nader: That’s what I leave them with.

Female: Right. Well, thank you very much, Jonar. Now, you’re off – after this you’re off back home to Australia and then the USA?

Jonar Nader: Then the good old USA.

Female: To promote it.

Jonar Nader: Six city tour, New York and all the way back west to LA.

Female: Oh, fantastic.

Jonar Nader: Yes.

Female: Thank you very much. You certainly – one of your mottos is, give me a microphone and you’ll give us an opinion.

Jonar Nader: Yes.

Female: You certainly done that today.

Jonar Nader: I like my microphone. Yes.

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Female: What sort of – it’s been eight years writing a book, what motivated you to write this book because you’ve done a lot of other things, and we’ll approach sort of later on in the interview.

Jonar Nader: Yes.

Female: I mean, why did you write this book?

Jonar Nader: Well, I lecture a lot and I give a lot of public speeches. And in so doing, I could reach five hundred to a thousand people at the time and that was really pretty small going. When I found so many people wanted more and I felt that the book was an opportunity to actually get to more people in a – in economical way time wise. But I started to write the book because I actually felt that so many people wanted more information when I sparked this interest. But it was born out of frustration. It was born out of anger.

When I finally saw the truth of how manipulative corporate life is, how stupid Wall Street is, how we all waste our time, and when I saw the bullies in the backseat of the bus sitting in the boardroom now, dressed in their lovely suits and they are now bullies dressed in fancy suits and I thought, what has changed? Everything is different but nothing has changed. The weakest element still wins. The most corrupt still gets to the top. The biggest crawlers still manage to, you know, manipulate everything else. And I thought nothing has changed. I left school at 14 because I couldn’t stand it there and here I am in corporate life, now I’ve got bullies and I have to be diplomatic. At least in school you could punch somebody and say, ‘Get out of the way.’

Female:

Jonar Nader: Now, you have to write a memo and go through the protocol you know. Protocol. And the thing that motivates me was that I realized all the wisdom of life that is hype is useless. They talked about patience is a virtue. Horrible. You know, only half true because impatience is pretty good too. If someone is wasting your life and abusing you, the quicker you become impatient, the better it is for everyone concerned, you know. Tolerance is a virtue. No, because we tolerate stupidity in the work environment, corporate cancer, liars, backstabbers, and they go, ‘Oh well, you know, he’s the boss’ pet or he’ll soon get promoted.’ No one get sacked anymore, they just get promoted. When they get promoted, you clapped meaning goodbye and good riddance and they go up higher in the tree and make everyone else miserable.

So, all these things, they just keep coming. Also, I realized that we need to understand opposites. We know about focus and people say be focused. But you also have to be aware but focus and awareness are opposites but you have to do them simultaneously. We’re often taught to do things in chunks, in punctuated movement. But you have to simultaneously be focused while aware. You have to be logical. And some of us are creative. You have to do both simultaneously and attain a new level of thinking, you know.

And so, in this world there’ll be intangibles and tangibles. You need to understand the opposites. I have therefore found that – in my search, I found things that other are yearning for. So, I put it in a book and it’s going really well and it’s just scary. I get fan mail everyday. Today, just here at Whitcoulls, a lady said, ‘Are you Jonar?’ And she looked at me. Of course, I wouldn’t know her face. She wouldn’t have known mine but we’ve been corresponding through email. She had a tear in her eye. She had a lump in her throat because she said thanks for your kindness because I sent her a few words of encouragement and gave her a bit of strength.

Female: That sort of made me feel good.

Jonar Nader: She resigned her job. Yes, and she’d resigned her job. She worked for a huge corporation. She was telling me of the manipulation. She said, ‘What do I do?’ And – and you know, she did it. I didn’t do anything. But I was a stranger out of the – out of the six billion people in the world, this lady here in Wellington happened to send an email to this kid in Sydney and now, we just met by accident and …

Female: She rolls up to Lambton Quay Whitcoulls.

Jonar Nader: Yes. She didn’t know I was going to be here and that’s the power of the author. And I think that authors, the word author means authority. And I don’t like it when authors write books that are just anecdotes.

Female: Yes. You mentioned that in your book and the three guys.

Jonar Nader: Yes. All that are just be kept brochures. All they do is they promote the corporations they’ve worked for, their clients, they’re going about how wonderful this corporation is or that corporation is. Yes, fine. That’s a story. But go to the best magazines in the world and pull out the best of anecdotes and give you – and you read the bibliographies at the back of books and you’ll know what you’re reading. You’re reading Time Magazine, Fortune Magazine, Harvard Business Review, and ten other books.

Female: But what makes this book differently?

Jonar Nader: One is that I don’t have an axe to grind. I don’t have a client to promote. In fact, not a single company is mentioned in my book, not a single person is mentioned in my book. So, it’s got nothing to do with – with someone else and the, you know, trying to promote someone else. The second thing is that it actually doesn’t give you the solutions but it helps you to ask the right questions and until you learn to do that, you can’t arrive at the right answers.

The other thing that’s different about it is it actually is well-researched, eight years, and not once did anyone know that I was writing a book. I think …

Female: Yes, I find that quite interesting.

Jonar Nader: Yes.

Female: You sort of plugging away in the back of the mind this whole time.

Jonar Nader: Yes. Well, the worst thing you can do is ring up a CEO and say, ‘Hey Bob, you know, I’m writing a book on leadership. Can I come and see you?’ He’ll put his best suit on and he’ll make sure, you know, he gives you the nice coffee.

Female: Sure thing, Jonar.

Jonar Nader: Yes. And then they’ll start talking about things like we here believe in teamwork. Rhetoric, Rhetoric. I actually have gone through these ages ago. When I used to work for a huge corporation and I’d opened up a magazine and I would read an article with a journalist with my CEO and the CEO was saying things that were rubbish. And I was like, ‘You liar. You just lied to the journalist. That’s not how you do it. You’re an intimidating bastard. You make people …’ I developed a twitch from my manager once. You know, it took me a year to get rid of a twitch because that’s the intimidation that they’ve spread.

You know, if I were a woman, I would have said, ‘Oh, you know, it’s because I’m a woman.’ I mean because I was young, I’d say it’s because I was young. But these people actually don’t just discriminate against women, don’t discriminate the girls back to blacks or Jews or ages, they just cold stop discriminators. And who’s going to stand up to them? Do you dare stand up to them? No, most people don’t. It just takes a few like me who put their neck on the line and when you look at the futurists of life, the Copernicus, the Galileo, the Pythagoras, these people were jailed, they’re stopped, and apprehended and they were called you’re out of line, buddy. And it’s so easy.

And someone said to me the other day, ‘How are you going to change the world?’ But you know what? I used to think changing the world meant changing everybody? I now realized, all I have to do to change the world is to change the minority because it is the minority that makes things happen. It is the few who actually lead the way.

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Female: Now, you’ve got your book here. You’re quite sort of controversial but How to Lose Friends and Infuriate People. Interesting title but we’ll get more on the title a little bit later on. First of all, who is this book targeted to?

Jonar Nader: Well initially, it was targeted to people who are let’s say, around 21 to 40 who have gone through the mill of obtaining supposed credentials, who have done everything that societies tell them to do and then they say, ‘Hang on. I haven’t really lived. I don’t – I haven’t reclaimed my life. I’m not happy. I’m supposedly a manager.’ And so, it’s targeting those people who really want to take that next step to reclaim their life. But strangely enough, the fan-mail I get daily are from people for who were like 90 who are ex-army generals or ex-CEOs saying, ‘I wish I had this book when I was growing up.’

Female: Really?

Jonar Nader: And a 14-year-old girl wrote most fantastic things that she read it and it was just so important to her and she’s forcing her parents to read it. So now therefore, I realized my audience is, you know, 14-year-olds to 90-year-old, people who are both in corporate life and government and so on. It wasn’t actually written with a target in mind. You know, I didn’t say I would go after this demographic. It was written with the kind of person in mind, the people who are sick and tired of the lies and the stupidity and the hype that keeps going around time after time after time. And it actually offers some really sound wisdom and it also provides some clear advice. However, it really doesn’t give you any solutions because the book engages the reader to come up with the right solution. So, that’s why some people read the book and say, ‘Gosh, I’m exhausted.’ You know, because it really does make you think and that’s why I say, ‘Don’t read more than one chapter at a time.’

Female: Because one thing that strikes me when I was reading is you read the page and you’ll say, ‘Yes. I’ve noticed that my whole life but it’s now sort of clear to me as to what’s just happening.’

Jonar Nader: Yes.

Female: And you’ve got it on the front here. You got to read it – read it twice and read between the lines. Well, what does this sort of mean?

Jonar Nader: Okay. You know like there’s a – there’s some books out there that you can read them every year and every year, you benefit from them. Even like some comedy. You know, there’s some like I love British comedy and I can watch certain British comedy that has been out since 1930, 1950 and every time I watch the tape, I laughs at the brand new joke I’ve never seen before because it is rich and full. This book is rich and full with wisdom but it actually is useless until you combine it with our wisdom. But as you grow up year and year, you’re combining it with new wisdom. So, the book is like this magnet and you bring your wisdom to it. And that’s why I say, if you read between the lines, meaning, interrogate yourself, ask yourself, really look at things, don’t just read words, you’ll see more and more and more because it’s engaging. Yes.

Female: And so, there’s really nice way to sort of think about it that way. That it’s sort of partly your own book as well. That’s what you’re bringing. You’ve sort of started the catalyst for your own – the reader’s thoughts.

Jonar Nader: It asks the right questions. You see, I have this philosophy that says, if you ask the wrong question, you’ll get the wrong answer. And if you don’t understand the question, you won’t understand the answer. And so, I hopefully ask the right questions. I have – I used to teach a lot and the first year of teaching, at the end of it, my students said, ‘I’m not sure what we learned, sir.’

Female: .

Jonar Nader: And I felt somewhat offended because I thought, why is it – you know, I put so much work into this and you’re telling me you’re not sure what you learned. But I – so the next year, what I did is the very first day of the semester, I gave them last year’s test and most of them got 20%. At the end of the year, they got the full on exam and they got 80%. So, I could see that they had learned something but my teaching style is so that actually people end up earning the knowledge. I don’t say one plus one is two. I say, what do we mean one? Why are we combining them and so on? And so, we go through the process of trying to understand what we are dealing with and you will arrive at two. I won’t tell you it’s two. And then you will think you earn the knowledge. And at the end of it, you’ll say, ‘Well we’ve known this. What are you telling me?’ And that’s the greatest thrill really for a lecturer or a teacher.

Female: And I – you know, it makes a lot of sense.

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Male Speaker: From the studios of channel 9, entertainment center of the galaxy and a relay around the globe through Melbourne, Sydney, Canberra, Brisbane, Hobart, Adelaide, Perth, Darwin and New Guinea welcome yet another two hours of zany mad-capped stick on Hey, Hey, It’s Saturday with Daggs and the dregs. And now, folks, let’s hear it for the host, Daryl Somers.

Daryl Somers: You always get a headache and you’re just doing the start of a show. Had a letter.

Ossie Ostrich: Had a letter?

Daryl Somers: Had a letter from a guy who watched us many years ago and he wrote to us. He said, ‘You may recall that 13 years ago, I wrote to your “What cheeses me off segment”.’

Ossie Ostrich:

Daryl Somers: What a great start to a letter!

Ossie Ostrich: Yes.

Daryl Somers: Isn’t that a great start to a letter.

Ossie Ostrich: He’s still waiting for an answer, isn’t he?

Daryl Somers: Yes, the thing is I do recall.

Ossie Ostrich: Yes?

Daryl Somers: Yes. He wrote in to complain about how difficult it was for kids to understand what news readers were saying due to their overuse of difficult long words.

Ossie Ostrich: Oh, yes.

Daryl Somers: Now, you and your team acted out a special skit to exaggerate this problem. Interestingly, Prentice Hall, the Paramount thing – communications company have just launched my book called Prentice Hall’s Illustrated Dictionary of Computing. Now, that’s the computer book this guy has put out.

<0:01:36>

Daryl Somers: But …

Ossie Ostrich: It will be exciting, real funny.

Daryl Somers: Yes.

Ossie Ostrich: It’s a must to everybody’s library.

Daryl Somers: Yes. And the thing he wants to come on the show and be on red faces as a judge.

Ossie Ostrich: Right.

Daryl Somers: And – because it says, you know – what does it say? Now, the thing that cheeses me off is the fact that Hey Hey It’s Saturday mainly caters for viewers who are mad about entertainment. Well, what about technology? I would like to appear on your show and re-live that skit and show you how difficult it must be for people of my generation who didn’t grow up with computers to understand computer terminology.

Ossie Ostrich: What’s his name again?

Daryl Somers: As much as I – his name is Jonar C. Nader.

Ossie Ostrich: Oh, Jonar, stiff.

Daryl Somers: Basically, yes.

Ossie Ostrich: Yes.

Daryl Somers: But, didn’t you get a lot of national exposure after your book then …

Ossie Ostrich: Yes.

Daryl Somers: … Jonar.

Ossie Ostrich: Yes, yes.

Daryl Somers: There you go. How are you, Redmond, are you coping with the season?

Male Speaker 2: No.

Male Speaker 2: Not at all.

Daryl Somers: What? You not?

Male Speaker 2: I was trying to do a ‘Hey, Daryl’ before we got that book. I was just going to say that yes, hold it up, thank you. We’ve already got Deane Hutton on the show. Why do we need two dweebs?

Daryl Somers: Now, come on. He’s probably backstage there though. Which would be a shame because he’s not on until next week …

Male Speaker 2: And that’s where he should stay.

Daryl Somers: But he’s probably back …

Male Speaker 3: I think it’s fantastic. It’s sort of like an episode of Beyond Grecian 2000.

Daryl Somers: Hello, the boys are going out.

Male Speaker 3: Sorry, no. That’s all we’ve got. That’s about it. That’s as funny as we get, Daryl.

Male Speaker 2: It’s an equity thing, Daryl.

Daryl Somers: Okay. Off they go. The boys are leaving. Okay, we’ve given Jonar C. Nader a big plug, Mike Brady a big plug. Legacy have got theirs already, That man there is Paul Norton. He has a band and a very beautiful wife Wendy Stapleton up there. And there ‘When We Were Young’ as the number, go for it, Paul!